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Badi masoom si khwahish hai is dil ki
Ye pyaar bhi karna chahta hai
Aur khush bhi rehna chahta hai
Yeh chahta bhi hai rishton ko nibhana
Par na thokar khana chahta hai
Aur na rokar jana chahta hai

Ye sath bhi deta hai
Apne jazbaat bhi deta hai
Doobe jo rishton ki naiya
To badhkar hath bhi deta hai

Ye samajhta bhi hai
Aur samjhaata bhi hai
Roothe jo koi
To manata bhi hai

Par phir bhi na jane
Kyu reh jata hai akela
Samete apni khwahish ko
Ankahi har farmaish ko

Bas ek choti si to zid ki thi
Mera hath pakad kar chalte tum
Mayus jo hota ek pal ko
Seene se jakad kar bharte tum

Aur karte na jo fikr meri
Man rakhne bhar ko keh dete
Ki dil me basa k rakhte hain
Seene se laga kar rakhte hain

Khush ho lete itne mein
Kabhi jyada na manga tumse
Dost ki hi darkar thi tumse
Koi vaada na manga tumse

Itna sa tum na kar paye
Ab tumse aur mai kya mangu
Bas masoom si khwahish rehti hai
Ashkon ki numaish rehti hai

Par aaj ae dil tu kyun roya
Jo kabhi tha na tera, use kya khoya

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My life took an unexpected turn today.
A part of mine
That was meant to amend me
Whenever I broke down
A part of mine
That was meant to comfort me
Whenever my pains get unbearable
A part of mine
That I felt would always believe in me
Even when whole world defies my existence
A part of mine
That I thought would never say no
Whenever I need someone to be at my side
That part just left me
With such a short notice
That I didn’t even get time grasp the situation
I wasn’t prepared for something like this to happen
Nor was I aware that the tree
That we flourished with years of trust and love
Was so weak to withstand a single stroke

I never knew
How important it was
To pinch everyone every time
To remind them of their existence in our life
How important it was
To make a list of things that will go wrong
If that someone is found absent for a long time
And send them as daily newsletter to every person
How important it was
To let them know every day
That they mean a lot in our small world
So stop taking tests every time, leaving us heartbroken
How important it was
To ignore our passion our work our desires
Just to make that someone feel special
Else they would find themselves obsolete from our lives

Yes I failed on all these grounds
I never made you feel special
Although you were the first person
With whom I shared all goods and bads of my life
I never poked you every day with a message
Although that day would have no meaning
If you were not there to accompany me

Yes I failed every time you tested me
Yes I gave my work a priority over you
Yes I wasn’t there every time you need me
Yes I wasn’t there to catch your tears every time before they fall
But that doesn’t make me a heartless guy
Nor it means I don’t care for you

No matter how worst things get between us
No matter how wrong my words sound to you
You were, You are and You Will
Always be a part of my life

Part Of My Life

Part Of My Life

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Kya do dilon ke rishtey
Kamjor hote hain itne
Ki bikhar kar toot jaayein
Majboot ho chahe kitne

Saalon ki baandhi ye dor
Jispe kehte hai hum humein naaz hai
Kya aaj bhi hai resham ki buni
Kya aaj bhi shabdon ki mohtaaj hai

Har pal tujhe chaha, har pal tujhe samjha
Sabkuch kiya tera, jo bhi kuch khaas tha
Sehem jo gayi tu, kabhi duniya ke darr se
Roya tere sang, mera saaya tere paas tha.

Lafzon me jo tu bayaan na karti
Nigahon se padh li teri har ek woh baat
Dil jo dhadka tera, jaane se mere
Thama hai mene har pal tera hath

Phir aaj kya hui, khata aisi humse
Jo baithi ho yun, gumsum murjhayi si
Andekha jo kar gaya, ek pal ko tujhko
Tune to kar li, humse ruswayi si

Duniya ki sari, nafrat seh lenge
Gar tu humse naraj nahi
Dilon ke jo rishtey hote hain
Woh shabdon ke mohtaaj nahi

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Got caught in a situation
With nothing to write
No stories to dictate
And no feelings inside

This world around evolves
Every pie of a second
Still no words to explain
What to me just happened?

A friend got brand new lappi this week
While the other got a mighty car
Someone got a pair of specs on his face
While other one?s face got a scar

Everyone is having something to say
Something to write about life
But I am confused, sitting calm and diffused
Like a Moon but without moonlight

I wake up everyday
Pledging lots of things to share
About my dreams, about my love
About things rarest of the rare

But for every time I try
My heart close down its gate
Feelings prefer to remain buried inside
Words fall short to express my state

This phase in life can come to you
Anytime without your will
When whole world seems to be chatty around
But only you want everything still
Don?t feel retarded in such a condition
Take a paper and a pen along with
And write down whatever your heart feels about
Similar to what I just did.

Sad and Still

Sad and Still

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love you friend1

Today, I was having a chat with very close friend of mine. A friend with whom I can openly share my feelings, my happiness, my sorrows, my guilt, and almost everything. After having a long chat for hours, we departed with just saying:

Bye
Gudnite
Swtdrmzz
Tkcr
Tata
ShubhRatri.

I remember when our friendship was in a initial phase, our departing words were just composed of “Bye Gudnite” or at max with “Swtdrmzz”. But as days pass by, we became more frank and concerned about each other’s well being. So “Tkcr” was added in the sequence to increase depth of our emotions showing how much we care for each other.

But then later, when these many words were found incapable of sending warmth and depth of our feelings in text, we started inventing new-new words to increase the length of the greetings, just to let the other one know that I have love and affection for you in my heart but I am lacking in words to express them. May the length of my greeting let you know my concerns for you.

We added “Tataaaaa” and then we added “ShubhRatri”.

Still when we found feelings un-expressed, we tried all possible modifications of these 6 words, sometimes by enlarging the length of the words:

Byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee,
Swtdrzzzzzzzzzz,
Tataaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa, etc.

and sometimes by increasing the words or by modifying spellings

Bye Bye,
Good Night,
Have a dreamy night,
Take care dear,
It was really nice talking to you today, etc.

But even after having these many words with so many variations and forms, many a times I found them unsatisfactory and lacking in emotions.

I don’t know the reason behind this. Why there are loads and loads of words to be used by lovers but not for friends. Why it looks inappropriate or a boy/girl hesitates to use “Love You” or “Miss You” or any such words for a girl/boy who is really close to his/her heart.

Today, I want to make my friend know that how much I love to spend time and share words with her, how close she is to my heart and it’s not my dream-girl only whom I misses always.

Although my love for you and my frequency and extent of missing you will be a bit different from that for my dream-girl, I have to admit this:

I Love you and I want you to be a part of my life hamesha and forever.

love you friend2

Love You Friend

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From the day I was born
Till the day I may live
Am I destined to face the hatred
No matter how best I give ?

Sometimes I just wonder
Why God do all this to me,
Why people give me hatred, not love
Why not my goodness, do they all see ?

Why everyone stands against me
Why only I have problems in life
Why everyone else around is happy
Why its only me who struggles to survive ?

What wrong I did to this world
That made my life so unfortunate
What sin I commited to you my God
That you made my happiness truncate.

Have I ever hurt my parents
Or have I ever cheated close frineds
Have I ever showed disrespect to elders
Or have I showed disbelief in your presence

Answer Me God

Answer Me God

How long and to what end
Will I be the man to suffer
Is there any end of my hard times
Or the days will grow still more tougher.

Only thing I would like to ask
By the end of all these complaints
Am I not your child like all
Or do I deserves to live in pains.

Now my knees have grown, far too weak
And shoulders got bent to ground
Can’t carry any long, this bulk of ill fortunes
Take my life, before I kill my sound.

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This may be your story- 3 

His words were not looking satisfactory to me but I thought of relying on him coz he might have faced all these things as he has a girlfriend already.

When I checked my Facebook account late night, there were so many messages of her saying sorry, begging me to come online, with few crying similes at the end. And then I noticed the time for which she has waited for me to come online. There were messages from 6 p.m. to 10 p.m. almost after every 15 minutes or half an hour. I felt very bad for making her cry and was about to reply her, but Rahul suddenly stopped me from doing so. My hands were running towards the keyboard to type her a message, but I he didn’t let me.
Next morning when I saw her face in the class I found guilt for yesterday’s things on her face, begging me to talk to her. Even I was keen for the same but I ignored her.

I kept behaving like this for next few days with a hope in my heart every day, that she will approach me and will tell me that she likes me. But as days were passing by, conversation between us was reducing exponentially from her side too. Even our lab sessions were without a word between us. As I found that situation is going beyond expectations I discussed this matter with Rahul once again. He told me not to worry and said that she will surely say one day that she likes me if she truly does.

But I was losing my patience and my senses were saying that she is taking it in a wrong way. So without wasting a minute I logged in my facebook account and luckily found her online.

Prateek- Hiii.
Prateek- I lost my timetable today. Will you help me again? J J
Puja- Idiot. Nalayak. Buddhu. Now say it.
/* I knew what she is expecting me to say but was pretending to be innocent. */
Prateek-Say what? J
Puja- Are you saying it or should I leave :@.
Prateek- Hey hey…. Wait. Don’t go. Actually….. actually…….I felt a bit different for you from the very first day.
Puja- Oh. Different like what? Like a sister?

/* Now I need some guts to say what I feel.*/
Prateek- No no no. Not in that way. I mean like a….. I mean you and me…. more than just friends….
Puja- Oh ya. Even I was thinking of that. I need a brother here who can take care of more than a friend. This is what you too desire, being more than just friends with me. Is it Ok with you?
Prateek- You know what I mean, still you are pulling my leg. Ok. Hmmmm…… I Like/Love you.
Puja- Oh my God. Phattu bol pada. Wow I am surprised with this. By the way what does this Like/Love means.
Prateek- Actually its too early to be called love but me feelings are stronger that like. So I was confused. By the way why didn’t you talk to me these many days?
Puja- Hahahahahaha. You got caught in your own trick. I was just ignoring you to get your attention. Your eyes speak more than you do. So I was confident that you will surely approach me one day.
Prateek- Oh god I am such an idiot. I got caught in my own net. Very Clever ha…..
Puja- Oh What clever. Agar mene yeh step nahi uthaya hota to hum aaj bhai behen hi ban gaye hote.
Prateek- Hehehehehe. Might be.

And then we both carried our conversation too long that day. She saw my blushing face next day morning in class saying me M an idiot and I saw her cute smiling face saying her an angel.

This is how my story got started and is still going on. But I learned golden fact from her. If you want someone to be in your life, then go tell him/her. Don’t rely on signals. And do what your heart says, not what others says.
*******************Happy Ending********************

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