Kaise Bayaan Karun

Tujhe dekhkar meri aankhon ko jo sukun milta hai
Main kaise bayaan karun
Tujhe sochkar meri baaton me jo junoon dikhta hai
Main kaise bayaan karun

Kaise bayaan karun, apne pichle kuch mahinon ki tadap ko
Aur kaise bayaan karun, apne dil se hui us din ki jhadap ko
Jab ye tha to mere paas, par dhadka tumhaare liye tha
Jab ye khushi se naacha to tha, par bol aur geet tumhare the

Kaise bayaan karun, main is aalam-e intezaar ko
Aur kaise bayaan karun, tere dar pe lage us darbaar ko
Jahan main tha ik fariyaadi, apna dil dene aaya tha
Charche the jiske husn ke har gali, ik dafa mil lene aaya tha

Ab?dekho ek ye aaj ka din hai
Jab teri khusboo, meri saanson ka ik hissa si lagti hai
Aur doori jo thi darmiyaan, ab koi purana kissa si lagti hai

Kis kadar tere nashe mein main dooba hua hun
Kaise bayaan karun
Tujhe paakar main jo aaj yun poora hua hun
Kaise bayaan karun

 

BTS:

I started writing this before my brother’s marriage. Plan was to make him recite this on stage in front of everyone for Bhabhi. But couldn’t finish it on time and gave him the half cooked(only first two stanzas) thing. More than two months got over and finally I decided to finish it today.

And just for fun, this was the actual ending I came up with earlier 🙂

Tujhe paakar main jo aaj yun poora hua hun
Main kaise bayaan karun
Tujhe saamne roz dekhkar jo phool ke?bhatura hua hun
Main kaise bayaan karun

You were, You are and You will, Always be a Part of My Life

My life took an unexpected turn today.
A part of mine
That was meant to amend me
Whenever I broke down
A part of mine
That was meant to comfort me
Whenever my pains get unbearable
A part of mine
That I felt would always believe in me
Even when whole world defies my existence
A part of mine
That I thought would never say no
Whenever I need someone to be at my side
That part just left me
With such a short notice
That I didn’t even get time grasp the situation
I wasn’t prepared for something like this to happen
Nor was I aware that the tree
That we flourished with years of trust and love
Was so weak to withstand a single stroke

I never knew
How important it was
To pinch everyone every time
To remind them of their existence in our life
How important it was
To make a list of things that will go wrong
If that someone is found absent for a long time
And send them as daily newsletter to every person
How important it was
To let them know every day
That they mean a lot in our small world
So stop taking tests every time, leaving us heartbroken
How important it was
To ignore our passion our work our desires
Just to make that someone feel special
Else they would find themselves obsolete from our lives

Yes I failed on all these grounds
I never made you feel special
Although you were the first person
With whom I shared all goods and bads of my life
I never poked you every day with a message
Although that day would have no meaning
If you were not there to accompany me

Yes I failed every time you tested me
Yes I gave my work a priority over you
Yes I wasn’t there every time you need me
Yes I wasn’t there to catch your tears every time before they fall
But that doesn’t make me a heartless guy
Nor it means I don’t care for you

No matter how worst things get between us
No matter how wrong my words sound to you
You were, You are and You Will
Always be a part of my life

Part Of My Life
Part Of My Life

Love You Friend

love you friend1

Today, I was having a chat with very close friend of mine. A friend with whom I can openly share my feelings, my happiness, my sorrows, my guilt, and almost everything. After having a long chat for hours, we departed with just saying:

Bye
Gudnite
Swtdrmzz
Tkcr
Tata
ShubhRatri.

I remember when our friendship was in a initial phase, our departing words were just composed of “Bye Gudnite” or at max with “Swtdrmzz”. But as days pass by, we became more frank and concerned about each other’s well being. So “Tkcr” was added in the sequence to increase depth of our emotions showing how much we care for each other.

But then later, when these many words were found incapable of sending warmth and depth of our feelings in text, we started inventing new-new words to increase the length of the greetings, just to let the other one know that I have love and affection for you in my heart but I am lacking in words to express them. May the length of my greeting let you know my concerns for you.

We added “Tataaaaa” and then we added “ShubhRatri”.

Still when we found feelings un-expressed, we tried all possible modifications of these 6 words, sometimes by enlarging the length of the words:

Byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee,
Swtdrzzzzzzzzzz,
Tataaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa, etc.

and sometimes by increasing the words or by modifying spellings

Bye Bye,
Good Night,
Have a dreamy night,
Take care dear,
It was really nice talking to you today, etc.

But even after having these many words with so many variations and forms, many a times I found them unsatisfactory and lacking in emotions.

I don’t know the reason behind this. Why there are loads and loads of words to be used by lovers but not for friends. Why it looks inappropriate or a boy/girl hesitates to use “Love You” or “Miss You” or any such words for a girl/boy who is really close to his/her heart.

Today, I want to make my friend know that how much I love to spend time and share words with her, how close she is to my heart and it’s not my dream-girl only whom I misses always.

Although my love for you and my frequency and extent of missing you will be a bit different from that for my dream-girl, I have to admit this:

I Love you and I want you to be a part of my life hamesha and forever.

love you friend2
Love You Friend

Tera Intezaar Hai…..

Just read it in a flow and rhythm. 🙂

Na ho yun naraj humse
Abhi yeh dil zara udas hai
Tumhe chahte to hain dil-o-jaan se
Par ek ankahi si pyaas hai.

Yeh dil to chahta hai ki
Tujhe bahon me apni mai bhar lu
Teri rooh ko, tere akss ko
Khudme basar mai kar lu.

Chahta hun mera pal pal
Tere pyar ka gulam ho
Jab bhi zubaan khule to
Labon pe bas tera hi naam ho.

Tujhe choo saku, tujhe jee saku
Aisa kahan naseeb hain
Kehne ko hai yahan sab kuch
Phir bhi yeh dil gareeb hai.

Har pal tere na hona ka
Ehsas mujhko hota hai
Dil toot ke bikhar jata hai
Aur tukda tukda rota hai.

Ab aur nahi sahe jaate
Faasle humare darmiyan
Tere bin din to kat jaate hain
Par raatein deti bedardiyaan.

Khatm karo ye narazgi ab
Dilon ko phir paas aane bhi do
Janta hun dard tumko bhi hai
Bas bahut hua ab jaane bhi do.

Ek pal ko bhi na chain aaya
Hai dil tanha, tu gai hai jab se
Har ek pal, har ek din
Tere aane ki raah, dekhta hun tab se.

My Love For You

My love for you, is naive and pure,
My feelings are true, of that am sure,
The only thing that keeps me away from you,
My mind, my words, this world, this crew.

I may not be staring at you all the time,
I may be ignoring you, when you look at me,
I may seem rude, with my words and speech,
But my heart skips a beat, when you pass by me.

I will be at your side, throughout my life,
I will stay close, whenever you need me,
I will never ask you to change, for what you are,
But the only change I seek, is your last name.

Give me a look, am dying to have it,
May be your step can, make me move a bit,
We will pass this world, we will cross the lines,
We will have a life, leading above the cloud nine.

Things I Feel..

These words are reply from Boy’s side for the Girl’s letter Words Can’t Say

The things that you felt, I feel the same.
You express them to me, but mine never came.

My words get juggled, when I try something to say,
feelings are numerous, but my mind make them stay.

My feeling-less expressions, might make you realize,
that I don’t care for relations, and I maintain a disguise.

But O my pretty princess, that’s not my attitude,
My childhood was strange, that made me so rude.

Speechless was my nursery, memory less was my school,
I was never so thoughtful , keeping quiet was my rule.

This is how I was, until the time I find you,
You took words out of me, although they were few.

Your company made me comfortable, your words made me smile,
You were talkative enough, from you I earned my talking style.

Slowly slowly slowly, you entered into my life,
Became friends with me, you cut my shyness with knife.

You taught me to laugh, you made me to speak,
You turned up my life, and kept it at its peak.

Now since you became, a part of my life,
I dreamt of you last night, being my wife.

I woke up confused, wondering what was this signal,
Kept looking at your pic, confirming you as my right gal.

Finally a sigh of completeness came, with a mere thought of having you,
In my arms, in my mind, in my heart, whole life through.

Things I Feel

Please quote the lines that you like the most in this.

Words Can’t Say…

These are words of a girl who is missing her love. There is a large distance gap between them and they even can’t meet whenever they like. They are from different castes, and their families don’t support this. So they are just hoping that things will go good in future.

My words cant say
How much I love you
How much I need you
How keenly in my life
I want you to stay.

When I wake up in the dawn
I want you to be there
Holding my hand
On your knees, making me understand
Things will go good upon.

I miss you at noon
And I feel so lonely
You are the one who give me hiccups
But your absense gives me kickups
Please be my hubby soon.

With the soothing winds of the evening,
My desire for you increases,
I am loosing my patience
Please cross over this distance
And take me away, like a king.

Wiht my expectations fading down
I go to sleep sobbing high
Missing you like hell
Without you world is like a cell
Console me please, just wanna hear ur sound.

My words cant say
How my days pass by
How intensive are my feelings
How keenly in my life
I want you to stay.

..Our Love is Greater than Distance between Us..

Love is greater than distance between us












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This may be your story- 1

“Why this college administration want us to wake up so early in the morning. I mean, don’t they love to be at their home and spend some quality time with their wives after their kids leave for school. Aaah early morning at nine is so weird. Don’t they know that engineers’ day starts at night and we need to take proper rest after that? Huh….”

I was murmuring this and cursing my college dean while I was getting ready for the first class of my college life. Somehow I managed to get into the classes by 9:12. Thank god that our teachers at least have some courtesy to provide relaxation of 15 minutes in the morning session. Being so late, I can only afford a seat in the last row. But actually that’s what I would prefer even if I come early. After settling myself there, I took an eye at my professor. Oh my god. How can a person be so monotonous in his tone and activities? If he is speaking at 60db now, then if u listen him after 30 minutes he will be still at 60db. I can’t imagine anyone more boring than him.

So I took off my eyes from him and started scanning the whole class for something of my interest or something that I can stare at for the rest of the class. Scanning from the left end till the right, my eyes stopped at an angle with center in the first row. I don’t feel the need to tell you that first rows of the classes are reserved for some beautiful creatures of earth. But I found this one as some exception. I could only see her hairs from that angle. And I don’t know when and how I suddenly started loving curly long hairs. While I was trapped in her beautiful hairs and was trying to figure out her gorgeous face, the professor started ascending to the back benches of my side. I never want my professors to come back and see what we do at back benches, but this time it was like my dream coming true.

Following the professor, her eyes too turned back and to my goodness, almost to my side. OMG….OMG….

My eyes were wide open after getting a look to her face. They got stuck at her face and my heart was feeling like-

Teri jheel si neeli aankhon me doob jane ko dil chahta hai….
Par pata nahi kyu ye kambakht chasma beech me aa jata hai….”

My eyes were begging her to take a look at me and and and…….she did. She looked at me for few seconds. Well I don’t know whether she got some message from my eyes or not, but my heart was saying to her “Yes dear yes. I am the one you are looking for last many years. I am your true mate. I am the one and only one made for you. Trust me please trust me. Don’t take your eyes away from me.”

I know I am a bit lucky but not that much. But since that first eye contact till the end of the class she was dancing, singing, laughing, having fun with me in my mind. While I was enjoying my dreams with her, suddenly my eyes and ears became attentive coz Prof. was about to take attendance. My eyes were focused on her hand and ears were listening to every single word of him with full precision.

“Roll no 33….Rahul Verma”

“Present Sir”

“Roll no 34….Puja Singh.”

“Present Sir”

It was her this time who raised hand on this call. The very next moment I started my efforts to memorize her name and roll no.

“Roll no 35….Prateek Porwal”
.
.
.
.
“Roll no 35….Prateek Porwal….??”

“aa.aa..a.p..p..present Sir”

I was shocked. I was numb. I was speechless.
Now what’s this? Is it a sign from God to bring us together or just a coincidence? Or am I still dreaming?

By the time I was busy in deciding what it is the guy beside me pinched me.

“Aaah… Why you pinched me?”

“Hi I am Rahul Verma.”

“Oh hi. I am Prateek Porwal. But why you pinched me? Is it the proper way to introduce yourself to others?”

“Oho. Why shouldn’t I? I mean, you are the one next to Puja. Lucky guy haa…”

“Oh there is nothing like that. Why should I be happy? I am not interested yaar.”

“O really..? Then I will give a try on her for sure.”

“No don’t you dare to………a..amm. I mean why you want to try on her? See the girl beside her. She is really pretty na?”

“Yaaaa. But look at Puja yaar. She is looking soooo sweet and simple. I would prefer Puja.”

I don’t know what happened to me and I stood up from my seat and went out of the class. She was there in my mind all the time. While I was waiting outside the class for next prof. to come, Puja too came outside with her friend and stood at some distance by my side in a way so that she can easily keep an eye on me. I am not at all good in acting but somehow I was trying to pretend that I am not looking at her intentionally. Seeing this, she gave a cute smile and then went back to the class.  This made all 32 of mine to appear (come front).

Well, I just followed her next into the class and knowingly passed from her front in some strange style that I have never ever adopted before. I sat back on my seat without giving a look to guy who was there by my side. But he pinched me again.

“Ooooh… What you want now?”

“Why you went outside in between our conversation?”

“Simply. No specific reason for this. Now please let me pay attention to the lecture.”

“Oh I know where your attention will be?”

“What do you mean haa?”

“Don’t try to befool me. I can sense it from your eyes what you want.”

I just kept quiet for some time and then said:

“Yaaa. Actually I don’t want you to look at Puja in that way again. Why don’t you try on her friend? I mean she is also too good yaar.”

“Hahahaha…. Don’t worry bro. I was just taunting you that time. I already have one girlfriend in my hometown and I can’t handle two at a time. In fact it is hard to handle even one. May God bless you..Hahahaha. But trust me; it’s very tough to keep them happy always. Even if u will take your heart and keep it in front of them, they will still find something to become upset and then they will look into you to do a bit more for them.”

We both laughed badly on this. But my senti eyes became shining eyes within seconds.

I took a sigh of relief after his words. At least the guy who was most likely to try on her is out of the competition. Now I was having a fair chance of winning her heart.

To be continued….

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My Sweet Morning and She.

My Sweet Morning and She:

 

It was around 8:30 in the morning. A great mess was spread all around. I was in a position that I can’t express. My roomies were sleeping as if they got drunk last night, with a don’t care expression for time and college on their faces. And even same was my condition. And I was busy with the sweet dream that she wished me last night before she went to bed. My laptop was below my legs. And my mobile……….??
Oh, my God where is my mobile…..?

My hands started scanning for it with my eyes still closed. When I didn’t find that, I woke up frightened…..
But do you really feel that I woke up with worries about my mobile on my face..??

Nah….
I woke up with a deep expression of irritation. Now instead of looking for it on the table or rack, I took my head out of my bed and looked down on the floor coz I know it’s not the first time that I didn’t find my mobile with me. It usually happens coz sometimes; just to feel my sweet dream as real I move my body accordingly. And these body movements of mine normally make my mobile to suffer. Anyways, when I looked down I found it far away below my roommate’s bed. I took It from there and scolded him “What were you doing there idiot. Don’t you know you were supposed to be on my bed under my pillow..? How you went there…?? ”. This caused deep silence in my room (although it was already). But my mobile didn’t say a word. I again shouted in a higher tone than before coz his silence after my last question increased my anger. “My question was for you stupid. Why u went there? Don’t you find my bed comfortable enough for your sleep…?? My mother sent you to be with me always. And you were supposed to wake me up at 8 today… What’s the time now…?”

I knew that it’s more than 8 now coz I can sense it from my surrounding light and through my window. But the thing that made me angrier was my mobile. He still didn’t answer. So, with my whole strength of that lazy morning, I pressed his center button. As soon as I pressed it, my mode changed from anger mode to danger mode. There were 10 new missed calls. Deep shit and fear rolled down my skin. It was her. She normally gives me calls in group of 10’s. I mean once she finds that I am unable to pick up the phone right now, she keeps calling me until the figure rises to 10. The logic behind this figure is; it gives the number of missed calls a two digit number which in turn gives her more right and reason to scold me. My tone suddenly changed to the most polite version I have with me. I politely asked my mobile- “Dear why didn’t u wake me up while she was calling…?” He didn’t answer this time too. But when I had a look at the top of the screen it says “Your mobile is in silent mode”.

Oh my God. Oh my God. Now you see how innocent my mobile is. It wasn’t his fault but still he was hearing my harsh words. I quickly put it on General mode and said “Sorry friend I was not knowing that I forgot to move you to the general mode after my class yesterday.” And you know my mobile is so kind hearted. So he forgave me.

But the problem was she was not that kind. While I was worrying about the calls my phone screen flashed again. It was her again. My hands started shivering. My whole body was trembling so hard and I found myself in dilemma whether to pick up the phone now or the next time. I thought so because the 1 minute time that I will get in between those two calls can save me from the unwanted consequences. So I preferred to pick it up next time.

That one minute was mind-storming for me. Two halves of my brain were struggling to decide an excuse.
First was saying to tell the truth that I was asleep. While the second part was making counter comments that she will yell like hell on you if you tell her that u were asleep as she was calling since 7:30.

So the 2nd one said to tell her that I was taking bath. Now the 1st one rose opposition. He said that she knows it very well that you can never take bath so early and before your class as you are too lazy, and she will surely catch the lie.

By the time my two halves were busy making arguments, phone ranged again. Oh fish man I am about to face her in next few seconds and those two idiots are still struggling to prove themselves right. But what should I do now. Neither I am ready with the excuse nor I can ignore the call, coz if I ignored it again I will have to face a big trouble the next time I call her. The only option left with me was to pick up the call and face my fate. My condition was like a man who is weak hearted and has just seen the most horrible movie made till now. My whole body was shivering, hands were unstable and lips were not in a condition to say a word. How will I face her…??
Oh God save me this time. Next time I will surely take care of my calls and will wake up by 5 o’clock in the morning. But please do save me this time. Please God please.
Finally I picked up the phone and was terrified enough to say a broken Hello. I said “H..h..h..e..e..ll..o”. From the other side I heard a very very sweeeeeet voice saying “Good morning dear”.

To your surprised faces, I must say now that the whole image that I made of her till now is just opposite.

The real truth is that she is the sweetest, the most loving, the most caring and of course the most adorable person I have ever met in my life till now. She really mean so much in my life and ya u guessed it right – I really love her a lot.

Coming back to my phone chat now. I replied her in a lazy tone “Yaaah……..Good Morning”.
Without saying a word about why I didn’t picked up her phone she first enquired “You had your breakfast?”

She cares for me more than I do. Just because of this nature of her I love her the most. We had some nice talk then and while I was enjoying my conversation with her she reminded me the time. Oh it’s 8:55 m still at my bed. I need to be in the college by 9 and its just 5 minutes that I have.

I was having two options now: One is to run away to college rite now without wasting a minute (Thanks to Listerine mouthwash that can make this possible) and Second is to have my breakfast first and get late for the class.

Now u may be thinking that what I would have chosen.

I went for the second option just because of her. She always insists me to have breakfast as she knows I normally skip it in hurry. So I decided to make my teacher wait for me for 10 minutes and I promised my dear one that I won’t go without having it.

This made her feel so happy and then I concluded my phone chat with my love towards her.

“Byeee…. Love You Mumma”.

And that sweet one replied me in return with same love and affection.

“Love You too Beta. Have a great day.”

…………………………………………

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